PMS Turns Mommy Into a Monster

It’s no secret that I have pretty severe PMS. Anyone who is unfortunate enough to be near me in the week preceding my period can attest to it. I’m sure they would be more than happy to share their horror stories about some of the things I’ve said or done.

It was bad before but since I became a mother it has become SO TERRIBLE. I wish I could make those words bigger and bolder so you could understand the intensity. I pretty much turn into a monster. And grow horns. I breathe fire too. It takes every ounce of energy not to say the things that go on in my head. You can be pretty sure if you happen to be eating in my proximity during this time I am wishing that you would choke on the food you are chewing like a dinosaur. And that I wouldn’t give you the Heimlich if you did.

Here’s the strange part of this whole ordeal. You know how whenever you live together with another woman your cycles synch up? Even if you don’t live together, chances are you and the women you are closest to have your periods near the same time? It’s an odd phenomenon. The scientific community doesn’t provide a huge amount of support for it, but I don’t believe them. I’ve seen it happen too many times.

Here’s the even stranger part. The reason I’m even writing this. I swear that Gus has PMS. Don’t laugh. I am serious! I really think he does. Not only that, I think his PMS is the same week as mine.

During my PMS week, he is a little terror. His behavior is always at its worse. He whines. He yells. He cries. He’s super needy. You can’t talk any sense to him. He’s completely irrational. Horrible things come out of his mouth. His emotions are erratic and unpredictable.

I used to think it was only in my head. I figured I’m so aggravated during this period that everything is clouded by negativity. I’m viewing the world through very angry, irritated glasses so it would make sense that I don’t feel all warm and fuzzy towards him. I’m not seeing any rainbows.

But, it’s not in my head. Yancy has said on more than one occasion, “I really think Gus has PMS. And I think he has it when you do.”

So, I’m taking a survey. Am I onto something here ladies? (or gents, I don’t want to discriminate). Do your kids have PMS? Do they cycle with you?

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